Wednesday, November 15, 2006

A mixture of Happiness and Stress

I'm ecstatic....thrilled...even tickled pink. I had my weigh in last night. I am utterly proud to announce that I lost 3.2 pounds! I am now 211.2 pounds! That is such a huge difference from where I started. Amazing to know that at one point I weighed 295 pounds (on my scales which weighed me 10 pounds lighter than everywhere else...). So I am excited beyond belief to have posted a big loss.....especially knowing that as long as I can post consistent 2 pound losses, then I will make my goal by Christmas. (and if I don't..well, I'll make it by mid-January...or the beginning of February...or whenever).

I'm utterly stressed. A dog recently came under my care. He came under my care becuase the person that we entrusted to take care of him didn't do a good job. (well, I don't know..but the dog got sick and he didn't do anything to help the dog.....the dog is my husbands grandmothers, she is in a nursing home). SOOO I've been trying to nurse this poor dog (big German Shepherd....previous police/prison dog) back to health. I went over there on Monday and "THOUGHT" I saw the dog fall down. I wasn't sure though...I thought he may have slipped. ON Tuesday I was back, to entice him with more treats and good things. The dog was laying against the kennel door....immobile. I actually had to shove (gently of course) to get the kennel door open and shut. I was in tears, it was terrible. I called around and could find NO-ONE to help me with the dog that late at night....I couldn't move the dog...even though he had lost a lot of weight, he still was pretty big and heavy. SOOO, I tried to make the dog as comfortable as possible (blankets and such) and made an appointment for this morning. Yes, the dog is no longer suffering. I hate making the decision to have to 'put an animal down'. It's just way to heartwrenching!

Soooo, I go to work. I'm stressed, very emotional and just plain icky from all that had happened. I just wanted to eat and eat! I didn't want to stop. I actually didnt' do too badly...only 5 points over my daily allotment. AND I exercised my tail end off this evening...and earned 5 points to make up for it. BUT, today was a total struggle!