Tuesday, June 21, 2011

This Girl and that girl

This girl feels horrible in her body.  Many times she doesn't do what she wants to do becuase she's afraid that people will laugh at the fat girl. 

That girl has a confidence that is evident
in the way that she walks, and stands and holds her head


This girl doesn't want to be in front of a camera.  The excess pounds squeeeze the happiness and joy from her life.  Everything seems a chore and she's always tired and halfway ill.


That girl poses for the camera.  She has no problem letting the world see the happiness and joy oozing from her pores. 


So what is the difference?  The pictures are all of the same person.  We could say time..."This" girl was younger and hadn't realized the important thigns in life and that "THAT" girl had?  But there is one thing that blows that theory out of the water....and that is the NOW girl. 

I'd like you to meet 'NOW' girl. 

I changed myself from "this girl"  and turned into the "That girl".  I was like a butterfly coming out of it's cacoon.  I felt wonderful.  I felt beautiful.  I felt ALIVE for the first time in years.   I swore that I would NEVER return to "THIS girl" , the overweight sad girl.  NEVER would it happen.  But I lost control.  I've regained (thank heavens not everything) but I have watched the life drain from me.  I'm once again ashamed.  I'm once again not holding my head high.  I'm once again not the happy bubbly confident person,....that person that I KNOW is still lurking inside me.   

I want "THAT" girl back. 

15 comments:

Hippo Nymph said...

So go get "THAT" girl back! Hold your head high. You've done it before so I know you can and WILL do it again. I'm sending love and encouragement your way...

Karen@WaistingTime said...

You CAN do this! And, you are not alone in letting it happen. I've been there and done that and sworn never again. So... let's be who we want to be:)

Thrice Blessed said...

You can do it. I've regained too, and I'm back on the right track again... the hardest part is getting back on the right road and getting your mind in gear on it... once that happens the rest will fall into place.

timothy said...

i know you can accomplish anything! sending good energy your way! xoxoxoxo

Sarah said...

I know what you mean! It's so easy to get mad at yourself and beat yourself up for it. But turn this around -- you KNOW you can do this. You've done it before.

Many people enter this journey having no success, no road map, no idea what the destination might feel like. You have that. You know how good it feels to be thin and fit. You know how much work it is. And you have that in your corner. Work it instead of letting it get the best of you.

And know you are not alone. I've been where you are. It sucks, but it's manageable.

NotPregnantJustFat said...

You can get that girl back! You just have to be concious of all the things that made you go from that girl to this girl and try and change them. At least that's what I'm telling myself. It won't take a day or a week or a month, but just working it slowly will help it stay off.

Michelle said...

I will try to avoid writing my own blog post in response to yours :)

You are where you are. Being where you are now is part of your journey. Getting back to where you want to be, that's part of your journey too, but you won't get back there standing in your own way. I have this image on the left of my blog that says, "Your life" and points in one direction, and "No longer an option" that points in another (at least that's how I remember it). Sort of along the lines of, "today is the first day of the rest of your life." It won't help to spend a lot of energy wondering what happened, why, etc, etc. Spend that energy figuring out what you want and how you're going to get it. There's also no energy for shame. You have nothing to be ashamed of. This is YOUR journey, this is your self discovering life, learning, growing and sharing. Your blog post is great, I'm glad you are out and determined to make progress. You are not starting again. Do not forget that. You have tons of experience, you've been down this road and that experience will make this journey much easier, and maybe even MORE enjoyable than it was the last time. You do need to learn from this. If you don't learn from it then it was a waste, but I know that you will. You will avoid some of the mistakes of the past, not all of them, but some. You have a strength and a determination now that you did not have before and that will help you reach your goals, and maintain them. One of my major mantras is, "It's all about maintenance." It really, really is. Focus on that, focus on who you are on the inside, on what your body can do and be, on how much YOU want this for you. I could go on and on with this crazy rant post but I just feel so strongly about where you are now. Don't let that negativity into your brain, push it out with a walk and some great tunes or with a bike ride listening to the birds but push it out, you need positive energy, supportive thoughts, encouraging images and feelings. YOU CAN DO IT!! Join me in my own "getting back to where I was." We can do it!!

A Place to be Me said...

You WILL get that girl back! I know you will~

F. McButter Pants said...

You know how to do it. You have to just take it day to day. I think NOW GIRL looks great. I've regained 25 lbs. It's hard. Food is the mother of all addictions!

Darcy said...

MF, I love you all the same whether you are this girl or that girl or the now girl. :) You're a great person. Hugs.

bbubblyb said...

You are "THAT" girl MaryFran. You know what my suggestion is, therapy. I think we have reasons for our struggles and we have to sort them out. We really do have to fix our minds as well as our bodies if we want to be the person we know we can be.

Don't feel ashamed though that will just make you feel worse. Stop letting your weight define you. You are so many things, so much more than your weight.

LOVE YOURSELF, that's the main thing you need to do!!!!

The rest of us love ya :) *big hugs*

Anne H said...

Love her, and she'll come back....
But really - she (obviously) never left you!
When we treat ourselves right,
the "magic" occurs!
Easy does it, my friend!
You are doing fine!

Tami said...

Been there and done that myself! Check out my blog and photos to read about my similar story.

Don't look back, just put one foot in front of the other and move forward.

You already know what to do, what works and that is half the battle!

Teresa said...

You can get that girl back, it's just a bump in the road. Biggest thing to remember is that Rome wasn't built in a day, and niether was that girl. One day at a time, and one decision at a time. Move, drink your water and make healthy lifestyle and food choices. You know how to do it, not take what you've learned and take the next step, with your head high.

Kathy said...

Hello, I always like to read about Health tips.

I lost approx 100 Pounds weight.

It was my biggest dream which was come true by california medical weight management.

I had tried many things, like control on diets, workout at home, weight loss pills and many other things, but nothing helped me. I had lost lot of money.

One day I got an offer for free medical weight loss checkup and 40% discount on Program. I went for free consultation. They ensured me that I would lose my weight, they shown me previous results, their techniques and programs. I was impressed and enrolled in the program. Within a month, I lost 25 Pounds. I was so happy. In another 4 months I lost 100 pounds.

My all friends were surprised, that was amazing...
I am thankful of Dr. Michael.

Friends, if you want to lose weight, I suggest you to talk with the doctor, they offer free weight loss consultation, to contact them, you just need to make appointment online and they will call you for free advice. Best of luck....

http://www.calmwm.com/