I used to weigh myself everyday. However this time around I'm not weighing as much. I am definitely weighing on Sundays (I have to report my weigh in to a group I am a member of) and also on Mondays which is my official weigh in day. I have to admit that I have taken a couple sneak peaks throughout the weeks. I've been OK with that. It's all been good. Until this Wednesday that is. I stepped on the scales. 240.9. What???? That is 1.1 pounds up! What in the world? I ate right. I exercised. Could it have been that I exercised the evening before AND ate a late meal??? I swallowed my disappointment and continued onward. I was in my caloric budget and I exercised again. Wanting to erase the negative scale report from my mind I hopped onto the scales on Thursday morning. Surely the scales would show some love. But no...those scales were EXACTLY the same as Wednesday morning. 240.9 Seriously? What in the world! OK, OK, OK Same thing...evening exercise...late meal. Surely that was the reason. Disappointed but not willing to let the scales win I plodded on. This morning (Friday) I hopped onto the scales. I KNEW that this scale travesty would definitely right itself today. Seriously. It had to! I've done everything right. I've exercised...I've eaten right. I'm DOING IT! All scale procedures followed (seriously...don't we all strip down to nothing, pee and get every drop of waste out of us before hopping on the scales.....don't act like you don't!...cuz I know you do!.......) I stepped onto the scales. I felt like doing a drum roll as I waited for the scales to register my weight. And then it did. I looked down.......and what wonderful number did my eyes behold? THE EXACT SAME weight. Holy crud-a-moley! My mind immediately started to mess with me. 240.9. What are the odds that my weight didn't move even a stinkin' ounce in the last three days. Wait...is my scale broke.....will it not go lower??? I immediately rejected that idea because the other day it did register me in the 230's. But then the next idea rolled into my mind. 240.9 is obviously the weight that I'm intended to be. It will not drop any further. 240.9...this is it I guess. Yeah my mind is warped....if you didn't know that before you do now!
That negative talk though is getting me no where. My mind is screaming at me to just give up 240.9 is where my body obviously wants me. But I'm not going to give in to the temptation to listen to that negative self talk. I am doing what I need to be doing for my health. I'm going to keep doing that. Besides...it's not even my official weigh in day. So I don't know what my official number will be. Seriously...all of this scale badness could right itself by Monday! The choice is mine...give up or continue on and be healthy and damn the number on the scales.
I'm choosing to damn the scales. The scales are JUST a number. It is not a true testament to the effort that I'm putting in. Yeah, I know that the numbers on the scales WILL follow along with my effort. But it just may not do it in the time frame that I personally find satisfactory. But taking the scales out of the equation. I have successfully completed week 2 of the couch to 5k program....I'm starting to run. ME...a runner! I'm smiling more throughout my days. These last five weeks of having my food addiction under control has brought about a more self confident happy person. I WANT to smile. I WANT to sing. It's not an effort to do these things. I feel alive. I feel confident and ready to actually face the world with my head held high. I actually WILLINGLY take my picture (OK OK OK...face shots...lol). I know that my 13 pounds (well 12 as of today) isn't really visible yet....it's the self confidence that is inside me blossoming and growing that is making amendable to picture taking. So my question.....even if the scales NEVER show anything lower than 240.9.......aren't I still a winner????
Cathy nominated me for the Liebster Award....I figured it would be fun to play along.....
Here’s how it works-
Each blogger posts 11 random facts about themselves.
Answer the questions the tagger has set for you
Choose 11 new bloggers to pass the award to/nominate
Come up with 11 new questions to ask your nominees
Go to their page and tell them about the award.
No tag backs!
11 Random Facts:
1. I love "I Love Lucy" My pets are all named after the show. Sometimes it's funny because the show will be on and they will hear their name (Lucy, Desi, Ethel, WinniFRED, and Mertz) and they will jump up and stare at the tv because it's talking directly to them.
2. I am a bit sarcastic. (just a bit mind you). My husband doesn't get sarcasm (how did I end up with him...haa haa haa).
3. I used to be an elementary school teacher. I left the profession. It took me at least 10 years before I could even talk about the experience without crying......my last year was that traumatic.
4. I like to write. I have a novel in the works...I'm pretty excited about it...but just need to work on discipline to sit down and actually WORK on it.
5. I am a jack of all trades...master of none. I dabble in quilt making, cross stitch, crochet, scrapbooking, photography, etc etc etc. I know enough about each of them to do a pretty good job.
6. I get compliments for my photography..... but seriously....I just mash the button and hope for the best sometimes....and those pictures are some of my most amazing shots! (ROFLMAO)
7. I read....ALL the time. I never thought I would switch to digital books...but I LOVE LOVE LOVE my kindle...and since switching to digital about a year and a half ago have not looked back and read EVERYTHING on my kindle.
8. I am a kid at heart. I don't know that I will ever really grow up.
9. I always wanted kids. It breaks my heart that circumstances have kept me from having that opportunity.
10. I have a love hate relationship with living in the country. I like country life for it's openness...and the garden...and the seclusion. I hate it for the critters and for having to drive 20 minutes to go anywhere (groceries, stores, gas)
11. I gave up eating most meat. Simply because a cow looked at me with the most gentle eyes.....and I knew that I couldn't do it. I couldn't eat anything with such benign gentle eyes!
Questions that Cathy asked:
1.Are you a cat or a dog person? Cat cat cat!
2.What is your favorite workout? Zumba....it's a social thing too
3.What do you do for "me" time? READ
4.If you won the lottery (the really big one) who would be the first person you told? And why? My husband. It would change things in our life.....give more freedom for choices that need to be made
5.What is the strangest thing you can think about yourself? (What do you do, what do you own, etc) Everything about me is strange. haa haa haa
6. If you could go back in time and change anything, would you? What would you change? I would have worked to lose the weight years upon years earlier
7. What is your greatest accomplishment? Losing the weight the first time around
8. What was your favorite toy as a child? Dolls....any doll
9 Are you close with your family? Why or why not? VERY. Why? because I love them!
10. Empty your purse . . . what is in it? money, debit card, sunglasses, chapstick, three checkbooks, a small calander,
11. How did you start blogging? I started blogging simply for me. It was an online journal for myself. I never expected anyone to read it.
1. If you could change one thing in your life what would it be?
2. What is your favorite color?
3. If you could go on a vacation anywhere in the world...where would it be? Why?
4. What is your favorite thing about your body?
5. If you were shopping right now..what store/department would you be in?
6. Favorite type of book to read?
7. Longest distance you have ever ridden on a bike?
8. Glasses, contacts or perfect vision?
9. Toenails...painted or au natural?
10. Best thing about your life?
11. What kind of car do you drive?
My picks: (dang this is hard, I read so many blogs)
Fixing myself Thinner
The Journey to a New Me
Fatt 2 Fitt after 5
Losing the Shadow Behind
The Voices Within Unleashed
Bringing Pretty Back
Dutch Girl is Healthy