Monday, July 22, 2013

Stuck between

I am in a weird place.  I want to lose weight so badly that I can taste it.  I dream about it.  I get excited about it.  I WANT this.  UP until a month or two ago, I was working my BUTT off to reach that goal.  Then My foot started to hurt.  I eased off. (more on that later).  I was advised by the doctor that I could ride, use the elliptical and swim.  SO I started back up and was struggling to get my momentum again. Then I got sick.  Bam, the momentum got sliced in half again.  I’m well again…and I’m trying to get back into it again.  The problem…..right after I got ‘well’  I was hit with an emotional windstorm that has knocked the wind right out of my sails. 
 
This morning I was out on my bike riding.  I was crying as I rode along.  I’m sure passing motorists were wondering what in the world to do about the girl that was pedaling down the road at warp speed…well warp speed for me….with tears streaming down her cheeks. The ride cleansed that from me….or at least gave me the outlet for the emotions.  After the emotions had washed away, at least temporarily I was able to look at my weight loss efforts realistically and with an open mind.
 
So what did I discover?  When I’m losing weight my SOLE focus is on the weight loss efforts.   My focus in the last week or two has been divided.  I am overwhelmed by everything going on in my head and that is taking the focus from my weight loss.  I need to bring the focus back to where it needs to be. Easier said than done….but I’m going to try.  
 
 
The foot……well as I said in previous posts,  I saw the doctor.  I did everything he said to do. However, it’s not really getting better.  Well, let me take that back.  The bad pain has eased up, but the foot still hurts.  And hurts worse when I do something where I’m on my feet a lot.   GRRR.   I’m trying the KT tape.  I’ve heard really good things about it.  It’s a brilliant blue (that’s what the store had….I am personally a red girl….so I would have preferred red!  Maybe next time.)   It seems to be helping to ease up the ache.  We shall see. I’m about ready to pack it in and just start going to zumba (I miss my zumba peeps) and start running (I have a 5k that I’m registered for in less than three weeks!) and just ….oh well, you know what I mean!