Monday, April 06, 2015

Excuses

Today would have been my 13th wedding anniversary.  

My ex made sure I knew he was going away for a few days with his new girlfriend.  (All dressed up in clothes he wouldn't wear for me because they were uncomfortable....)

I've eaten a crapload of food today.   

Think there is a correlation?  

You know, I don't want the loser (I have more colorful names for him too) back.  But I mourn the loss of dreams.  I mourn the loss of what was supposed to be.  I mourn the sadness.   

So I'm allowing myself the candy. (And cookie, and the banana split flurry....)  Today.  But this has to end.  He is not worth eating myself back up to an astronomical weight!!!!!!


10 comments:

finding lori said...

Finish today with no regrets...you deserve it! Tomorrow is a new day! Hugs to you on this day. Love the quote!!

Summer said...

You are right about it all. Today food helps a little. Tomorrow will be better. Be kind to yourself!

jesseybell said...

Big hugs to you. Anyway that you can avoid your ex? You don't need constant reminders of him and what he is or isn't doing with his life.

Lori said...

Don't double trouble by treating yourself the way he does. Be good to you!

You are in a hard place in life. It is difficult to see it know, but life will get better. You want your body to be ready.
Lori

Darcy Winters said...

It's funny how people can get inside our minds and do that to us. Don't buy into it though. You are a fabulous person and he's an idiot for not seeing that. Don't beat yourself up for having a bad food day. It happens to all of us (sometimes it's several days in a row...)

Lynn said...

I call mine the Wasband and I can laugh about him now. You'll get there.

Kyra said...

You don't have to give up your dreams, just picture them with someone WORTHY of them!

Anonymous said...

Oh I feel for you. Block/hide him from any social media so he doesn't randomly pop up out of nowhere. Keep your interactions cordial and distant. It wasn't until I stopped myself from getting upset every time I saw/spoke to my ex that I could finally start feeling some peace. I still have my ex from 9 years ago hidden on Facebook. Not a bad guy, but his face with his perfect life popping up on my feed used to cause major anxiety even years after the breakup.

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*Time for Me* said...

I would have to wonder why whether I knew about his trip or not was so important to him. But that is for him to worry about, really. I remember when my ex-husband met someone else, and how it stung to see him with her, even though I knew our relationship could never work. I agree with the comment to remove him from social media and other places you could randomly come into contact with him. You can't move on with constant reminders of the past. It will get easier, no matter how much it sucks now.