Sunday, June 14, 2015

Come back!!!

On Friday afternoon I went out to lunch.   We have fallen into the routine of appetizers (pretzel sticks on Friday) and I got a buffalo chicken sandwich and fries.  I was so full that come dinner I was still stuffed to the point of being sick.   Really?   Why do I do it to myself.    I thought about it long and hard and decided that I need to stop ordering my food out of long ago habits.  I need to make new habits and return to my weight loss lifestyle habits!

You see, what I ordered is what the old maryfran would have ordered.   The 300 plus pound MaryFran would have ordered that (ok at least I didn't order dessert too!!).  My life is in an upheaval and I have just automatically slipped back into the habits, roles and routine that last felt comfortable.   Where did the 'no thank you, I don't want fries' girl go?   Where did the 'no appetizer today but thank you all the same' girl on a mission disappear to?  We can call her Elvis, because she definitely left the building!!!!     As I lay in bed thinking about it I knew that I was totally satisfied when I was eating the meals without fries....and the meals without appetizers.   100% satisfied and I felt great...none of this stuffed so full that I'm afraid a cat will scratch me and set free an explosion of pent up food.  The path I'm on is not a good one!!

So I am proud to say that when I went out to eat with a good friend of mine on Saturday at lunch that I ordered a salad.   Ok, so it had crispy deep fried chicken in it....it was still a salad.  (Was a time that I would have not ordered the crispy chicken and instead gotten grilled chicken or no chicken at all!)   I also was so happy to see my friend that I ate slow and ended up not licking my plate clean. (I actually left food...unheard of lately!)  And I felt fabulous after eating...none of the stuffed feeling for me on Saturday!!!

Sunday morning...another run.  Still happy with my decision to bump up one more week in the couch to 5k training.  It is hard but I can do it...a challenge is good!!!


And on the note of running....why is it that I feel I must take a picture of myself while running...or rather at the end of my run???  It's almost like in my mind the run is not complete without the obligatory selfie!   Yeah, I'm bonkers!!

While talking to my friend on Saturday I realized (with his kind words of encouragement) that I NEED to figure out the food thing.   I get home much later...most days after my parents have eaten.  I don't want to cook anything major for myself.  Thus I default to a pb&j or make a box of macaroni and cheese for myself. (I can say that most of the time at least the box of Mac-n-cheese works as two meals!).  Not horrible choices but not awesome. (Ok they are horrible..the Mac-n-cheese at least)   So I tend to end up grabbing food on the way home...more horrible choices!   Both weight wise and financially speaking.    I've gotta figure this out!!!!