Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Holding on!

My weight returned to my 'happy weight .   Which doesn't make me happy really.  I want my weight to go down!!!!    But that is the weight that I seek to settle at.   But no complaints....a few weeks ago I was hovering 2-3 pounds heavier!

The stress free existence after giving my resignation was  short lived.   Now that that is behind me I have commenced worrying (apparently) about my new job.   It's not so much when I'm awake.   It's when I'm sleeping.   Why yes.  I'm having dreams.   So for example....last night in my dream it was morning and I was fiddling around and working on some projects that I have ongoing in my life......and my friend Julie came over to hang out with me before I started my new job.  She could do that after all because she works for the same company....but she didn't start until 9 and I had to be there earlier.  (As a side not Julie does work for the same company but in Indiana and I will be in Maryland.). We ran to McDonald's (really?) and then settled back in to sort through some boxes of old stuff I was getting rid of.  And that's when I looked at my watch and panicked.   You see it was 8:13....I wasn't dressed for work and I had to be there at 8:15.    And that's when I woke up.   

Ive had similar dreams each night....always about the changes upcoming in my life.

So it's invading my dreams.   Just great!   I guess I'm stressed and was too dumb to realize it!!

I am still working on the 2017 miles in 2017  At the midway point of this month I had 92 miles.....for the month I need 172 miles.  So I am on track this month.  I need to accrue an extra 55 miles to catch up for the year.  So all in all I'm not doing too badly.  I'm hanging in there.....close enough that I'm nowhere near saying 'it's hopeless'.    What is saving me is the fact that we are riding our bikes 20-30 miles each week.   That is the only thing that's holding me close.  My work schedule (with the overtime) makes it harder to get my runs in.  (I still haven't purchased reflective items/lights so that I can safely run before it's fully light).   It's been hot (and Jason is whupped when he gets off work)  so we have very rarely done any evening walks.  So it really has been the biking and weekend activities that have saved me!!!!

Work....it's ok.  It has eased up a bit...at least they are more friendly with me.  I still get made to feel like a dunce because I'm not doing things the supervisors way.   I just respond with 'well you are asking me to change the way I've done something for the last ten years I've worked with the company....it's hard to break a habit...it's not done overnight'.   And just for the record...it's not that I'm doing anything wrong ....just different that she does it and how she was trained the end result is the same.   And I've passed through numerous audits (actually more than her since I have 8 years seniority on her) and my way and the way I was trained has been just fine with all the auditors!!   So I am just counting down!!!!   When today is over it will be exactly 2 weeks left!!!  

So that is where I'm at!   Hanging on!!!





Monday, July 17, 2017

Hope

Last week I was so nervous to give my notice to my work.   Remember I've only been at this office for two weeks....so it was kinda a 'I'm here....here's my notice!'   I was worried how they were going to react and how my last two to three weeks were going to play out.   Were they going to be mad about it....vindictive about it in terms of scheduling?  How miserable would I be!

Turns out not so miserable at all.   They are relieved to have me the two and a half weeks and understanding about my leaving.   What a relief.   Jason saw me after work and some of his first words to me were 'you can see how relieved you are to get that behind you'. And 'your smile is huge again!'

So obviously a lot of stress gone!!!

So the next morning...imagine my surprise when my when the scales showed me two pounds down...and on Friday another pound down.   Was stress holding me back?   

Oh my....I was only 5 pounds away from that next decade and incidentally that put me 5-6 pounds from my 10 pound goal for August 7.   Oh my word...could this actually be an attainable goal again????

Now I can't get too excited.   I didn't eat horribly this weekend. (1700 and 1800 calorie days....).but my weight was back up to those pre-low weight days weight.   Grrr.   But seeing those lower numbers gives me hope!!!!'

Our weekend was fun.   We rode our bikes.  The path/trail was muddy muddy muddy.   The first few mud puddles I carefully tried to navigate without getting dirty but as soon as I figured out it was hopeless...I just started charging through the puddles.   I was caked in mud!!!!!!


 So was Jason!!!




And our bikes.....


This picture was only half way in....by the end you couldn't see the green logo on the bike!!!!  
 
We were so dirty that we actually walked into the river to clean our legs off before changing clothes.....and after we changed clothes we took our dirty clothes into the river to rinse them off (caveman style beating them against a rock....quite literally). 

Yup....I loved ever second!!!   And just think...some people pay big bucks for mud baths....I got one for free and got some exercise in at the same time!!!

We enjoyed the normal animals along our rode...squirrels, lots of butterflies, turtles and this pretty guy that wasn't at all afraid of us!!



Another fantastic weekend!

Thursday, July 13, 2017

The cat is out of the bag

A few weeks ago I made a vow to lose 10 pounds by august 7th.   Why august seventh???     And more changes coming? What changes????

First let me say that I did get a run in the other morning!   That was a first in a while.   It's hard with the crazy hours that this new job has me working (I am scheduled for 46 hours next week)....6 days both this week and next.  I actually woke up at 5:00AM yesterday morning to run.   But it was just a bit darker than I felt comfortable with in terms of outside running on my own.   I will be investing in some reflective gear soon!!!! 

How is my weight doing???  Am I on target for 10 pounds???   I am down 1.4 from my July first weight.   So at least that's down.   But by almost two weeks in I should be down by more than 1.4 pounds to reach that goal!   

Well it is time to let the cat out of the bag.   About three months ago I sat down and really started hitting the job hunt hot and heavy.   I, for various reasons had only been half heartedly looking before then.   But the time had come for me to get serious.  Number one my job was not making me happy.....but the biggest aspect is that after ten years of great yearly reviews and wonderful customer compliments...and no negative marks on my record (in fact they kept adding duties since I did a good job), I am only making $10 an hour.  (Ok I lie ....$10.03 an hour.).   Convenient (for them) hiring freezes when they are throwing more duties upon me ("this is the job of a head teller but we have a hiring freeze so we can't raise your pay". And "oh this new job you will be doing falls under customer service which is more pay but since we are again on a hiring freeze we can't give you the pay raise/grade that goes with it").  Add to the fact that the insurance while affordable ($100 a month) was outrageously expensive to use....and honestly prohibitive to use considering the deductible is about three months of pay). So it was well beyond the time for me to find another job!!!   And in fact, a few weeks ago I even mentioned in a blog post about an interview.


So back to the cat that we are letting out of the bag...  part of this should come as no surprise because a few weeks ago I even mentioned in a blog post about an interview, the day that my sinus' were a full blown mess...and my teeth felt like they were falling out of my head!!!    But I am ready to officially announce it today.  I have been offered a job at a different company. (Yup the same one I interviewed for that day with the sinus pain...I must have hidden my pain well.....or maybe not and they were just impressed with my perseverance despite the pain!!!)  I will be driving a bit further to this new job.  But that's ok...it's only 15-20 miles further than where Jason works. As for insurance since that has been a big issue with my current job....  I just know the basics right now and I don't know the exact particulars of the insurance but I have a friend that works for the company at an Indiana office and she seems to have no complaints about it!!  Nor does she drag her feet about going to the doctor due to prohibitive costs!!!!    I do however of course know the particulars of the pay and let's just say I'm happy!   I'm very happy with the starting pay...(I'm leaving the $10.03 far far far in the dust!!  I will be able to afford to actually live on my own and support myself!!!). and I'm happy with the opportunities for growth that will be available to me (pay wise and career wise). 

So my kinda new job that I talked about last week on my blog  is only a temporary new job for about 4-5 weeks.   And I gave a three week  notice today....so it's out there in the open for public consumption now. 

So that brings me full cycle back to why August 7th for the 10 pounds?    That's my start date for my new job....of course!!!

Lots more changes and adjustments coming in my life.....I know that this job...the distance ...the hours...everything will bring total upheaval in my life.  But I'm confident that what is yet to come will be positive and that I'm FINALLY on the right track!!!

Monday, July 10, 2017

Monday duldrums

Blah blah blah.   I've got the Monday blues!   I wish I could stay home today!!!!!   But that's not the way life goes...so off I go in a bit to work!   I have a long week schceduled for me...48 hours scheduled at work.  (Why so many?  I have no clue????).  48 scheduled means that while I won't work less than 48.....I will probably work MORE than 48.   Uhhh....at my old branch we were always scheduled for 38...and the few extra minutes here and there took us to the 40 mark.   So yes...an adjustment for me.  But oh well...overtime.

My goal of 10 pounds ...well I am fluctuating some.  Last week during the week I dropped down 2-3 pounds...but today I'm right back where I started.  Go figure!  Frustrating to say the least...but I know that my eating in the weekends is frightening.  I need to clean that up for sure.  

Exercise during the week?   Uhhh. I'm still trying to figure out how to slip that in!  Maybe start running in the evenings???  Invest in reflective gear and lights and run super early in the morning?   Pull out exercise videos???  Ugggghh.  I will figure it out.  And I better figure it out soon because I have more changes coming and if my exercise routine is adjusted and in place it will bode well.

This weekend we walked/hiked some.  We swam some.   But the main thing was that we rode our bikes.     On the canal.  
We want to go back and explore the kilns/ovens of the old defunct Round Too Cement Company  in the fall/winter.

And the remains of the buildings.


We took the time to stop at the 'visitor center' if you can really call it that.   An old house along the canal that they have dressed out in period furniture that is open to the public some days.



We lucked out in that the volunteer that was there heard us talking about how we always wish we could see the upstairs of these old houses.   His words were 'I'm not supposed to let you...but let's go'. Awesome!!!!   You could tell that he loved the building!!!!   It's in pretty decent shape...cosmetic work is all it would need to be usable!!!  Maybe they will get some money and be able to open it someday!!

So annactive weekend...even though the scales were unkind to me this morning!!!

Thursday, July 06, 2017

Well Then

The new/sorta new job started on Monday.  And boy was it a day!!!!   I almost wrote up a resignation letter that day!  I saw Jason a half hour to forty five minutes after leaving (the time of the drive home) and he took one look at me and knew something was wrong.  Yes he showed that ounce of kindness and I just burst into tears.  (Poor guy!!).     Things have gotten better each day.    I am finally getting the information and supplies I need...slowly.   But hey I have a chair at my desk now and I found the bathroom (on my own since no one had the time/inclination to give me the nickel tour) !!!! That's good right??  (And I kid you not...those were just two of the many issues the first day!!!)

So here I am!!!!   I was so keyed up with nerves and then just stress about well...working at a desk without a chair and not knowing where the bathroom was (amongst a gazillion other things)  that I ate next to nothing at work this week.  My weight dropped!   I'm hoping I can hold onto that lower weight.  

But the problem?   I'm working mad hours (for me because I don't normally work overtime for this company...at my old branch we got in trouble if we had overtime) .   I'm already at 35 hours for this week (well I am when I add in the 8 hours of holiday time) and I am scheduled for a 10 hour day tomorrow and they are talking about adding Saturday on.    Next week I am scheduled for 48 hours.    Ok a few extra bucks isn't a problem.  What IS a problem is the lack of time to get in a run in the morning.    

So I guess this month is going to be the month of good eating.  I will move/exercise  when I can ...but any weight loss (and I'm still aiming for 10 pounds) is going to be through healthy eating alone!    

Game on!!

 That said...I have somehow already managed about 50 miles  in the month of July!   (I need 172 miles to hold even in my 2017 miles in 2017! .   

A long bike ride on Sunday


 and of course stopped for animals...




......toured an old fort (Fort Frederick)

(No that's not Jason!  Hahah)

...I push mowed on Monday...

And yard sales on Tuesday coupled  with a bike ride helped!!! 

Yes we got out and rode our bikes on the Fourth of July!  We went to the canal...it's shaded with lots of huge trees!!!




So I'm moving....I'm trying!!!!!  



Well Then

The new/sorta new job started on Monday.  And boy was it a day!!!!   I almost wrote up a resignation letter that day!  I saw Jason a half hour to forty five minutes after leaving (the time of the drive home) and he took one look at me and knew something was wrong.  Yes he showed that ounce of kindness and I just burst into tears.  (Poor guy!!).     Things have gotten better each day.    I am finally getting the information and supplies I need...slowly.   But hey I have a chair at my desk now and I found the bathroom (on my own since no one had the time/inclination to give me the nickel tour) !!!! That's good right??  (And I kid you not...those were just two of the many issues the first day!!!)

So here I am!!!!   I was so keyed up with nerves and then just stress about well...working at a desk without a chair and not knowing where the bathroom was (amongst a gazillion other things)  that I ate next to nothing at work this week.  My weight dropped!   I'm hoping I can hold onto that lower weight.  

But the problem?   I'm working mad hours (for me because I don't normally work overtime for this company...at my old branch we got in trouble if we had overtime) .   I'm already at 35 hours for this week (well I am when I add in the 8 hours of holiday time) and I am scheduled for a 10 hour day tomorrow and they are talking about adding Saturday on.    Next week I am scheduled for 48 hours.    Ok a few extra bucks isn't a problem.  What IS a problem is the lack of time to get in a run in the morning.    

So I guess this month is going to be the month of good eating.  I will move/exercise  when I can ...but any weight loss (and I'm still aiming for 10 pounds) is going to be through healthy eating alone!    

Game on!!

 That said...I have somehow already managed about 50 miles  in the month of July!   (I need 172 miles to hold even in my 2017 miles in 2017! .   

A long bike ride on Sunday


 and of course stopped for animals...




......toured an old fort (Fort Frederick)

(No that's not Jason!  Hahah)

...I push mowed on Monday...

And yard sales on Tuesday coupled  with a bike ride helped!!! 

Yes we got out and rode our bikes on the Fourth of July!  We went to the canal...it's shaded with lots of huge trees!!!




So I'm moving....I'm trying!!!!!  



Sunday, July 02, 2017

Plans and changes

Life will be changing drastically for me.  Lots of changes.  Some I know about...some I'm guessing at.  The first change occurs  July 3.  I am changing branch locations where I work.  It's kinda crazy because while I will be doing the same job and the actual work will be the same, it is very much like I am starting a brand new job.  It's crazy that after 10 years with this company that I will know no one that I am working with.  Yeah, I'm a bit nervous.  (isn't that crazy.....especially since I will have more seniority than my new co-workers....I think the manager is the only one that beats me on seniority...lol).

The other changes I am not going to get into right now....look for a first update within 2-3 weeks.

But really what I'm thinking is that I'm starting a 'new job' (Ok, a new old job....or whatever you want to call this change).   What a perfect opportunity to make some changes in my every day life!!!   I mean with my eating!   Healthy foods and all that jazz!  It's a fresh start!   There will be a lot of changes because my normal schedule will be all whacked out and running in the morning may be touch and go with whatever schedule they give me....and with the extra drive time to get to my new office.   But that's ok.....I will just figure it out and make something work!!!!  (I might be investing in some reflectors and such for early early early morning run!)

The other thing??? My month of no numbers is over.  It wasn't a colossal failure.  I didn't gain a bunch.  I didn't lose a bunch.  I kinda sat stagnant!  It's time to roll into this journey and really focus on getting my numbers to go down....and if they don't go down I want  to at least end the month by being able to sit back and say "Wow....I can see that my health has improved....my fitness has improved.....I'm a better person!"  

The habits I worked on forming in the month of June (tracking, water, activity) will carry onward.....that is a good basis for a healthy lifestyle!

But that said, I have a goal date in mind......5 weeks from July 3 (August 7th).   I want to be 10ish pounds down.  2 pound a week!  That's my plan and I"m sticking to it!   Yup..this time it's gonna work....I can feel it in my bones!!!!  New start and all that!!!!   And the other changes coming in my future.....well they will just give me more opportunities to make healthy lifestyle changes too!!!!!


Friday, June 30, 2017

Pretend

Let's just pretend that this last week did not happen!!!!  Seriously. 

I had a job interview on Monday morning.  

Monday afternoon I thought my teeth were going to fall out of my head with the onset of the sinus pain!

The headaches continued through the week...but I am happy to say that my teeth pain eased up.

The stress of my job and the uncertainty of my continued employment at the said job just drive me bonkers.

I tracked next to nothing.

I drank next to no water.  

I didn't run.

I barely moved.

I DID go for a bike ride on Wednesday afternoon.  I got off work at 2 and lucky for me Jason got off early too!

Oh and my eating has been not that stellar.

The week was a bust!!!!

So my weight for this week...I'm up a pound.   For the month...down a pound.  

My month of no numbers is over.  It wasn't a total bust.  It kept me somewhat on target but gave me a break.   

What does July bring????   
1.  Continued tracking....but this time I'm going to try to restrict my calories.....
2.  Continued water consumption
3.  Focus on where I want to be....not where I am!!!!

My 2017 in 2017......I managed to make the necessary miles to not fall behind in the month of June.   I didn't make up a lot of miles in my deficit...but I at least didn't drop back further behind.


Monday, June 26, 2017

Sinus schminus

Oh my aching head!!!!!!!!!    I am suffering from some sinus issues.   Yesterday afternoon I started noticing a 'sore tooth'.  But as the afternoon wore on the sore tooth became sore teeth....and by the evening all of my upper teeth are just an aching mess!!!    And of course I have the headache to go with it!!!!  There went my lunch plans for the day...because crunchy foods are just not happening!!!  Soft foods make my face and head ache but they are much better than hard ones!!!!   Reece's cups counts as soft right????  Hey...MILK chocolate counts as dairy right???  And peanut butter is derived from peanuts...nuts....protein!!!!!  Hahahaha
 

Hey...I know it's a king size....but seriously....it's been a rough morning!!!!  Stressful in some ways....for reasons that I can't go into now.....and of course the not feeling well....and  then coming to work where it's stress filled just is the icing on the cake!!!


My eating has been pretty steady. ....steady at my maintain level of food consumption.    And that's ok.   It's under control for the most part.

Exercise...it's going ok.  I'm moving...maybe not as much as I could....but I'm moving.   I did miss a run last week due to a problem with my foot (it's been an ongoing problem for years).  

Mileage for the month....as of right now I am at 168.37.....to hold steady I need 172 by the end of the month.  That should NOT be a problem!!!!  3.63 miles in 5 days....should be a piece of cake!!!!

Tracking is going well....

Water drinking....pretty good....I have missed one or two days of hitting a healthy amount of water but for the most part that's going well!!   

This past weekend was a bike weekend.   The weather was fabulous for biking!!!

 
I wish all summer was like the temps were this weekend!!!

And last but not least....my kitty cat Mertz is 8 years old.  From cute cuddly kitten to silly adult cat Mertz is a sweetheart!!
 

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

A smile or a grimace

Ok I know I'm a sick pup.....but I saw something on my run this morning that made me stop and think.

Yes I stopped running and took a picture....
 

Why yes it's a dead animal.  And seriously....it was either smiling in death...or grimacing.    Ok maybe that's just its normal face.  But it made me think about running.   When I see someone do I smile at them or is it really a grimace???

This morning my first half mile was rough and it definitely would have been a grimace.....I was breathing heavy from the get go.  I kept pushing through it though.   And by the mile mark I had settle down into a more controlled breathing.  And then as I crossed a street I saw someone walking one block over!   In my set route  I had one more block and then I would turn to run a block and cross over the intersection that the person was heading toward.  I made it my goal to run the two blocks and get to that corner before that person walked their one block.    So I started doing intervals.....sprint then jog...sprint then jog...sprint then jog. From point to point.  And as I neared that corner I saw that was going to make it!!!!   And then that bee-otch started to run!    I kid you not....they ran to that corner and got there a few feet ahead of me!!!!  Really?????     

I didn't stop the fartleks though...I did them the whole way through that mile of running.  (In the interest of full disclosure I will admit that two of my intervals were a few seconds of walking!).   My second mile was almost 2 minutes faster than my first mile.    Wow!!!!

So yeah...apparently I've been really bad about pushing myself to do the speed intervals...and I know I need to do it to increase my overall speed.   I guess trying to beat that person to the corner (me two blocks and they only one) was a good thing because it sparked me to push myself.   But yeah....they are still a bee-otch!!!


So on to the nitty gritty of this blog...it is a weight loss blog after all.   Today was weigh in day.   And I'm down two pounds.   Back to where I consistently sat for the last year....now to drive the weight lower!!!!  

I know I've said this a gagillion times...but I'm ready.   I'm ready to lose this weight once and for all!   I know it will mean restricting certain foods...eliminating others. But seriously...I can do this!   I've managed to mostly maintain my weight the last however many months.  Other than the last two or three really high weight weeks I have managed to maintain within a four pound radius for a good solid 8 months or longer.   I'm not looking for perfection.   I know there will be pizza on Saturday nights (we are creatures of habit and it's our Saturday night staple). And that usually gives us leftovers for Monday...and on occasional other days because pizza is awesome.  And I know that here maybe fries....or chips and whatever.  I'm ready to find that happy medium.  That happy medium where I can be a 'normal person'.  Because you see...while I know that this is a life time commitment...I also know that eating dry lettuce every day for lunch for the rest of my life is not feasible and sustainable lifestyle for me.  I am committed to finding that happy medium where I can have pizza on occasion (yes weekly) and still lose weight.  I have been eating about 1800 calories....with no conscious restricting on my part.   The weeks I ate 2000 or more I gained weight.   So my caloric restriction will not have to be a lot....so I think that I CAN find the happy medium!    And yes...that might mean that the weekend 'pizza date' might be a 'cheat meal!




Monday, June 19, 2017

Surprised

I just sat down and entered in my stats for the month.....

 
It's day 19.....and this for perfection I should have 19 star stickers (for water consumption). 19 smiley face stickers (for tracking) and 19 colored in spaces (indicating an active day)


I've done fairly well with my water drinking!!!  14 out of 19 possible stickers!!!!

Tracking....this should have been a freebie sticker for me each day..but this past Friday I just sorta threw up my hands and while I tracked breakfast and lunch I didn't track dinner! And that started the spiral...I didn't track anything on Saturday or Sunday.   Luckily for me...I tracked today!!!!    16 out of 19 possible stickers!!!

Evercise/activity?   I've done pretty good with that too....
Swimming, biking, running, push mowing and some walks.   15 out of 19 possible colored squares.

Sadly, my weight is not budging.   I'm not focusing on numbers but my calories are at a range where I typically don't lose.  I've learned that a budge of 1800 calories is too many for me.  So I shouldn't be surprised.  The good news?  This is a happy maintain level of food for me...

And even though I'm not focusing on numbers I am at 125 mikes for the month....50 more to get the necessary miles to hold steady in my 2017 on 2017 goal.   I don't think I will make up miles this month but I should be able to not lose ground!!!!

We had another awesome weekend....even though it was hot and muggy!!!!

We rode our bikes on both days. On the canal both days. 

 

On Saturday we saw a deer with two babies, a snake (which I almost ran over!) and a cool little turtle.
 

He was hiding!

On Sunday it was hotter and more humid!  We saw more baby deer (two mothers each with a baby....obviously really young based on how it was 'running'), more turtles (in the water) and big old bullfrogs.
 

We took time to stop and enjoy the nature and surroundings. So yes we stopped to smell the roses! 
 

And of course I had a kitty cat waiting for me when I got home!!!  
 
(I actually had two cats waiting actually...Mertz just likes to show her displeasure at my absence by ignoring me....but not Ethel!)

Another good active weekend!!!!

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Midweek check in

Well let's see......  maybe bullet points today....

*** I forgot to weigh in this morning so I don't know where I stand.   

***I did manage to get a run in this morning.  
 

*** The run was hot!

***The run was slow!

***My eating is so so....not bad.  But at the level of calories where I don't lose (1800).   But hey, I'm not looking at numbers this month.

*** I'm doing somewhat well on my water consumption.   It could be better but it is consistently in the 'fair to good' range.

***Have I mentioned that it's hot outside?


Monday, June 12, 2017

Where oh where

Where o where is this year going????   It is flying by!!!!!

Today started another work week.  Still no answers about my job.   Still no bites in my resume.  Still waiting and pushing forward to whatever the future holds for me!

Eating wise I'm still tracking everything and I'm still drinking my water.   I've also been doing well with doing something active each day.  Baby steps.....

I was going to jump on the scales today but decided not to at the last minute.  I'm sure I had some valid reasoning....but then again it was 5AM so maybe not!!!

A new mower arrived at the house (like a gift from the mowing Gods!!). So after a two week hiatus, I will be push mowing this afternoon/evening.  Yup....that hour or so is definitely going to count as my activity!!!   

We had another awesome weekend.   We took it easy but also got some bike riding in. 
 

 So a win win situation. 

I got a 'tattoo'. 
 

Ok then...it's not a tattoo...it's from a sharpie!   He also wrote 'property of jason' on my leg.  I told him I would never wash my leg.   Hahaha.   Yeah that didn't happen!   A sweaty bike ride = the need for a shower and a good scrub!    So my 'tattoo' (s) is fading.  Hahahaha

But hey...a good weekend is always a plus!!!!



Friday, June 09, 2017

The elephant in the room

Which elephant do I speak of?????

On Monday I got my road bike out of storage....
 
Yup.  I was excited.   I looked at it.  I didn't ride it.  I pumped up the tires which were flatter than a pancake!!!

Tuesday I looked at it...but didn't ride it.  The tires looked good...held air just fine!

Wednesday ....... I looked at it.   Tire pressure a-ok, but maybe I should wait an extra day to make sure that the tire's were not dry rotted and were capable of holding air for a few days straight!

Thursday.....I wonder where my bike shoes are....hmm ok right where I thought they were.   Let me check that air pressure!!!!

Friday.   Air pressure looks good and I'm off work maybe I should go ride!   Oh wait...I am out of cracked corn for the ducks.  Better go get some more!!!

Yes that is how my week went!!!    I was so excited to get my road bike but then fear took hold of me.

I have been riding my trek a lot with Jason so I knew that at least my legs were somewhat conditioned to riding.   But I know from experience that my road bike was a whole other beast.   

I knew that my arms would be sore.   I knew that my abs would be sore.   I knew I would be uncomfortable.   And quite frankly, the clipped pedals scare the living daylights out of me!  

The sore arms and the sore abs are just going to happen...so today I overrode that excuse!!

The clipped pedals?   Well they only scare me because I'm not used to them...and you DO have to remember that you are attached to your bike or it could be ugly.    But I've been trying to not let my fears rule me!!!   And not riding my sweet road bike because I'm afraid of the pedals?   How silly is that?   

(As a side note...yes I could put flat pedals on the bike, but wouldn't that be giving in to my fear!??)

So after getting the cracked corn, I came home and geared up....and out I went.

My legs hurt (kinda weird since I have been riding...just my other bike).

My wrists hurt.  

My arms don't hurt...yet.

I didn't go far or long.   I forgot my cellphone...and thus didn't want to be too far from home.   Plus Jason and I plan on riding this weekend (I'll be on my trek) and I don't want to burn my legs and body out and then not be able to ride with him.    But I faced those first miles.   I heard my shoes click into the pedals and I rode....and I stopped at each and every intersection, unclipping and setting my foot onto the ground...because repetition will help me get used to clipping in and releasing!!!

Soooo...
 


Is she still the white elephant?   Yeah...kind of.  But the scariness faded a bit!!!!!

Wednesday, June 07, 2017

Defeated

It is Day 7 and my calendar looks good!  I've tracked and drank my water each and every day!!!!    I have been 'active' every day but one.   Yesterday was a simple walk around the park with Jason...but hey it was movement!   The day that I didn't do anything active or 'move' was on Monday.   I had grand plans to come home and mow the yards....push mow.  How active is that?   I made one or two passes in the first back yard and the mower died.  Dead...kerplunk....belly up! We knew the mower was on its deathbed so it wasn't too shocking!  But a new mower was not waiting in the wings....so no mowing for me.  I instead went inside and read the time away!!!

The good news????  
 

Yes I got my road bike from storage!!!! I have pumped up the tires...they seem to be holding air well.  And yes, that is where my bike is going to be stored...I don't use the couch...and should Jason come over for a visit, I will roll the bike over and lean it against a dresser.   And yes, that is my solution to not being given permission to have my bike in the garage at home. (Jason stores my trek with his bike.). Hey, I laid an old sheet over the couch to protect it!!!!

Regardless...I feel utterly defeated.   I know this is a no numbers month....but I am continuing my weigh ins.   And let me say that it wasn't good this morning!!!!   I looked at my calories to find out why I was up 3-4 pounds and my numbers haven't been that bad.

 

And if you net in the exercise....

 

See not bad at all!   My water has been pretty spot on also!!!!

So very defeated.   I'm not giving up.  I'm still going forward with my no numbers month....but I'm concerned!!  

The other defeated feeling and honestly probably the largest portion of the defeatedness is pertaining to my employment. I alluded to this a few months ago...but as time passes I'm going to simply lay it out....because I'm worried.   A month ago they made an announcement about some changes coming to our work place.   They however did not tell us what they will be doing with the employees that will be displaced because of these changes.  We have repeatedly asked our manager and we get the 'I have asked and they say they don't know yet'.   (Uhhh. This change is happening in mid July!!).   The closest office to us is where we assumed we would be shuffled to...but I have heard that they are saying that that office is over staffed so that most likely leaves that out as an option for any of us.  

I have been applying for positions at other locations in the last month.  A lot of applications.   I usually get nothing in response.   Oh wait, I've gotten two responses.....one was saying 'you don't have the qualifications we needed'. (A four year degree doesn't trump experience in regards to that office secretary position apparently.   But hey, I knew I didn't have the "preferred experience" and decided to submit anyway!    And the other response was a form letter that said 'due to the high volume of applications we will only be responding to the 'chosen few'.  (Yes I paraphrased the 'chosen few' line!)    Also understandable.    Did I mention that I got only two responses out of maybe 50 applications?  (Maybe some are in the mail.)  That fills one with a huge sense of defeat.  Course maybe straight up rejects would be worse.  Hahahaha (At least I'm laughing right?)"

Defeat....what fun!!!

But you know what??   

*** I am still applying for all sorts of positions....because the right job is out there.  Out there somewhere  is a job that I will love.  Out there somewhere  is a job that will pay me enough so that I can stop relying on the generosity of my family for my living accommodations.  Out there somewhere is the perfect job for me!!!!

***I am still tracking my food....because regardless of what the scales say, tracking my food is good because it allows me to see what I'm eating and make adjustments as I move toward a healthier life!

***I am still guzzling water...because it's good for me even if it didn't help the number on the scales!

***Regardless of the number on the scale, I am still running and moving....because I want to live and be healthy!!!!

And yes...I ran this morning.....

 
I even made money on the deal!!!!

 

Why yes I stopped running for a few seconds to pick up the quarter!!!  Two weeks ago I slowed down to pick up a penny!!!!  I got a raise today!!!

So I'm not giving up....I'm fighting the urge to give up.   There are great things in store for me, I just have to push through to get to them!!!!

Monday, June 05, 2017

Who needs numbers?

The no numbers thing is actually working for me.....I think.

Smiley stickers.   I have tracked everything thus far this month. .  Every bite!    I haven't thought about my calories and have only  given my numbers a glance at the end of the day...most days.   This morning I actually went back and glanced at my total calories for each day.   I have actually without trying stayed below 2k.  Works for me.    I have noticed that I tend to chose more carefully when I am cognizant of what I am eating and what I have already eaten for the day.  Four days down...four smiley stickers earned!

Colored squares.   I have run two days and biked the other two days!  That means four squares have been colored.   I had plans for today...but the rain may prohibit my movement plans.   Regardless....four days down....four smiley stickers earned!

Star stickers.  I have been happy with my water consumption each day.  I am tracking it on MyFitnessPal, so I do have a number for each day.   But I'm not worried about getting a certain number.  I'm worried about getting enough and being happy with what I drank!   And I've been very happy (for number people I've been over 52 ounces each day!).  So four days down....four star stickers!!!!

So far so good!    I will know more when I weigh in on Wednesday.   That is one number I DO want to continue with even though this is a no number month.   I don't want to fall off the rails and find out at the end of the month that I gained 20 pounds!   So I will be continuing with my weekly progress report weight checks!!!

We had a low key weekend.  Jason is settling into his job...getting his sleep in line for his new hours....allowing his muscles to adjust to the different work...and busy shoving all sorts of information in his head during the week.  So the weekends have been more low key lately.   This weekend we got out on our bikes.  Both on Saturday and Sunday!  It felt good to be out there!!!

 
The second day we rode on the canal, starting at Riley's lock.
 

Friday, June 02, 2017

No numbers Month

I have started my month of no numbers.    That means that I'm not determined to drink a certain number of ounces of water...I'm not aiming for a certain number of miles.....I'm not lookin for a certain pace while running.....I'm not determined to keep my calories within a certain range.  No numbers!!!

My goals are 

1. to drink plenty of water....by plenty I mean I don't want to make it to the evening and say 'wow I've only drank one bottle of water!'    "Plenty" is subjective and totally based on my personal feelings about how my day went!

2.  Track my food!   Who cares what the calories are...I just need to track it!!!  :-).  Yes, I know what I track I tend to eat less calories and less junk!!!!   Simply because tracking opens my eyes to what I'm eating!

3.  Move more!   Once again no numbers...just aim to move more!   

So to that extent.  If I managed to complete an item I would give myself a sticker.   I decided to use my 2017 in 2107 calander to keep my stickers.  So I went out and looked for some stickers.   I didn't want to spend a lot of money nor did I want to search forever, so I settled on what they had at the dollar tree that I stopped into.   The stickers were a bit larger than I wanted but I figured I would make them work!

So I have stars for water consumption.  I am using smiles for tracking.   And for exercise, I am coloring in the block!

Why yes...On the first day of the month I got two stickers and a colored square!

 

And yes I ran this morning so I already colored in my square for today....and just a FYI, I've tracked everything thus far (and my dinner since I'm having leftover pizza) and I'm happy with my water consumption so I COULD go ahead and put my stickers in place for today too!!!

And of course a hot sweaty mess running picture from yesterday!!
 

I've picked back up on the smoothie thing.   It is an easy lunch to grab and go...it's filling...and they taste pretty good. Oh and did I mention it's healthy and not high in calories??? I'm then rounding it out with some fruit and voila....a healthy meal!!!

 
This one was a berry smoothie (unsweetened almond milk. Strawberries, raspberries and a splash or two of orange juice and water and protein powder)

I also had a Reece's cup smoothie this week...almond milk, chocolate peanut butter powder (pb2) and protein powder!

I tried a time saving technique today and it worked.  Yesterday I took the time to purée my fruit (I used raspberries and strawberries because that's what I had in the freezer)....I puréed it with a splash of OJ and some water.   Then I put a cup of the purée into a freezer bag and put it back in the freezer.    This morning I threw that bag in my lunch box....put the milk and protein powder into my blender bottle and added that to my lunch box.   The purée was 
A slushy consistency by lunchtime.   I dumped that into the milk mixture in my blender bottle and shook it up.   Delicious!!    So a huge win!!!   Sunday night my plan is to purée a big batch and freeze it for my upcoming week!

So the weekend is almost here.   We got rained out last weekend and since the forecast was bad we didn't take our bikes.  But this week we are certainly planning on riding!!

Last weekend...oh it was rainy...we were exhausted so we slept!!  Pretty much we slept Saturday away!  But I guess we needed it!!!

We walked on the canal though!
 

We went to the Marine Corp Museum...which was surprisingly really neat!!
 

I became a marine...for a hot minute.
 

And the coolest thing....the original flag in this iconic picture ....

 

Is on display....

 

Yup...it was cool.  And some hot day when we don't want to be outside we may go back and stay longer!!!

And lucky me...my man is an awesome cook!!!  He cooked for me this past weekend!!!

 

And lucky me...the new weekend is almost here!!!!! 


Wednesday, May 31, 2017

A deficit of Success

Adjust your dial, changes are a coming!!!!!!

 As I alluded to in my last post, my May month goals didn't go over well.  I didn't make my 2017 mileage.  I didn't make my running mileage, I didn't lose weight, I didn't track!

So moving on!

I have thought about my monthly goals for sure.....and this month I am breaking it down....

1.  Water consumption-drink it....drink a lot of it
2.  Track my food- it doesn't matter what...just track it...every bite!
3.  Move...stop being a slug and blaming rain and sore bones ...move!!!!

If you notice I'm not setting any goals of "you will do this 5 times a week" or whatever.     I'm starting from a deficit of success and I just need to give myself some success.  If I set a number in my head of how often, I am simply setting myself up for failure.  My challenge is simply to do those things as much as I can.  Do it so that I feel I was successful.

To track my progress, I will be adding either stickers or colored areas to my mileage calendar. (I want stickers...but that means I have to get to the store in the morning before work...so I may default to colored pencils and my own color coded coloring!

This is the simple success plan!


Meanwhile...work is stressful and getting worse!!!!!

I am not giving up on the mileage challenge of 2017 miles in 2017....but I am going to ease up my focus on it for a bit.  I need to get everything in line...not just my mileage!!!!!


Monday, May 29, 2017

Stay tuned

So, May has been a colossal failure in terms of my May goals.  I don't have the stats yet.....a post later this week will fill in the numbers to show how bad, but suffice it to say that I don't think I will be able to say I nailed even one of my goals.  So stay tuned for the hideous results!

The complete and utter goalage failure has made me reevaluate some things.  

*****Number one. Am I focusing too much on my mileage and not enough on my healthy eating?  

*****Number two.  Are my goals to restrictive.  'I will lose enough weight to be in the next decade by the end of the month'.   I'm not saying that that is a bad goal.   But for ME...maybe it is? Maybe I need to make my goals more generalized. Something more like,  'I will lose weight this month'.   When I focus on the numbers it is so very easy to throw up my hands and say 'well, I can't make that goal anymore since I had a bad week'

******Number three. Maybe monthly goals are awesome....but maybe I need to break it down into weekly goals!    A week sounds so much more manageable!   And maybe I need to drop it lower into daily goals.    I once years ago had the idea (and I've seen it on various blogs since then) to have a calander and put stickers for each day in which I practiced healthy habits.  Each day was its on small encapsulated challenge.  

******Number four...:rewards.   I have none.   Maybe I need to come up with something tangible.  The stickers from number three would probably be a good start!

So I've got some serious thinking to do in terms of my June goals!  So stay tuned.....changes are a coming!!!!


Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Wednesday weigh in

I have done better with my eating so far this week.  I can't say I was perfect...I did eat another cookie...or two.   I also had a piece of cake.   But I also had more fruits and veggies than I have been having as of late!

My weight as ofo day was looking up by about two pounds....so I wasn't expecting greatness.

This morning I woke up and immediately felt thirsty....that's not usually a good sign for my weight!   In fact, based on that fact I almost skipped my weigh in!   But at the last second decided to roll with it anyway!

I was back to my boomerang weight...that weight that I seem to 'fall back to'.   That's fine with me today because that means that I managed a maintain this week.   I don't know how....but I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth!!!!!

But it makes me sit back and ponder.  What am I pondering?   If my weight went down just by adding the fruits and veggies but still indulging in cake and cookies, what in the world would happen if I eradicated those things???  

Ahhhh...that's when greatness occurs I guess!

Last but not least, random tidbits......

***I got a run in yesterday morning.   It was slow but steady!  

***I only have 4.24 more running miles left to reach my 20 miles for the month!

*** 70 miles in 8 days is what I need to break even for my yearly mileage goal (so I don't fall further behind).   Yeah....we are taking our bikes this weekend, and I have two...maybe three mornings left for running to help boost the miles.   But all in all I'm just hoping to squeak through with only a minimal deficit.

***Jason is settling into his new job. He seems to really like it. Once he is in the routine and used to these hours we will hopefully get back on our bikes and back to our walks in the evenings.

***Work is still stressful.  I'm just praying really hard!

***I splurged and bought a new dollhouse last weekend.  I need another dollhouse like I need a hole in my head!   I still have a LOT of work left to do on the dollhouse that Jason got me for my birthday in December.  I have one room almost done.  The bathroom.   For the record it needs a mirror which is in the works....some picture/decoration on the wall behind the toilet....and some bathroom items in the shelves (toilet paper, bottles, etc)
Next up...the kitchen...then the living/dining room, a bedroom, a nursery and an attic.....oh and a porch!!!

I still have some small things to work on in the mini mansion too.  Bedding and little human touches...(this picture is a week or so old...the furniture is now all white)
 


***Ive enjoyed my nephew visiting some of these evenings.....I think Ethel enjoys it too!