Saturday, October 17, 2009

Hello, my name is Maryfran and I am addicted to food. I like the texture of food. I like the taste of food. I like the initial and immediate rush of pleasure that I receive when I taste something delectible. I like it so much that I continue to eat more of that same item in an attempt to recreate that burst of pleasure. That burst of pleasure can soothe all worries, it can ease all emotional pain and it can elevate and heighten a positive mood. However it is fleeting. Intrisically I know that. Yet I continue to find myself in this pattern of initial pleasure and then a spiral downward in a quest to hold onto the short lived feeling. But once that initial rush has been received it's over. It is not possible to eat more of that food to get that feeling back. Yet over and over again I try.

I'm not downplaying any other addiction, because I would NEVER want to have to deal with the addiction to alcohol or any of the various drugs out there. But I can't help but feel that in terms of beating an addiction that food has to top the list. Why? Becuase if you are an alcoholic, for the most part you can remove yourself from temptation. The same with drugs. (generally speaking for those two addictions). But how in the world do you remove yourself from food. I need food to sustain my life. I am constantly forced to confront this addiction. It's a matter of survival...I need to eat to live. Yet how ironic that my habits of eating (the addiction that I suffer with)were causing me to die. I can't get away from eating. I need to do it. Which means that every day I will have to confront my personal demon of food addiction. It just doesn't seem fair.


Vanessa Miller said...

I hear ya girl. In the last few days I've had much more than my body needs. It's this time of year for me. I love the change of season and the upcoming warmth of the holidays. I like hot, creamy, and rich foods when it is chilly out of doors. Today I plan to invite my husband to bake with me am I'm looking forward to it. Oddly enough I don't feel a bit guilty.

F. McButter Pants said...

Food is the Mother of All Addictions! Take it from me, a recovering drug addict.

It's certain kind of food I have to avoid, not all food. Just food that triggers me to binge or over eat. Sometimes it works out some times it doesn't.

don't give up!