Thursday, April 05, 2012

Hurt

It hurts.  I had a half of cake sitting at my house.  I momentarily thought about cutting it into small pieces and freezing it for later. (that approach really does work when you have some control...because sometimes you really do need something sweet...and if you have a small little something in the freezer that you can pull out and pop in the microwave a few seconds....it's great...portioned and everything).  I chose not to do that though.  I have no control at the moment.  Cake...why yes I do believe I will have a piece.  The freezer is tooo close.  So ignoring the hurt, I carted the cake to the garbage can and upended it into the can.  Yup, I threw out a perfectly good cake. It hurts to throw away food that tastes so good.

Hurt...seriously....maybe I'm just too gullable and believe what people say to me.  Because then when it proves to be untrue it causes hurt. 

My foot....HURTS.  Started a week or two ago......at first it was just twinges after exercise, but it's elevating and getting worse.  So I'm not sure what's up with that.  I know that yesterday at work, wearing my shoes was torture (ok, I wasn't tortured long, I just kicked my shoes off and went barefoot....today I'm wearing clogs so that it's easier to slip them back on when I need to). 

Hurt.....actually worry and frustration.  I want to exercise.  Yeah yeah yeah, never thought I would be writing those words!  But I want to continue on with my quest to becoming a runner.  I want to go to zumba.  I want to!  So my feelings are hurt....I want to...but I'm realizing that I need to figure out what's happening with my foot.

So hurts that emcompass emotional, physical, mental...etc etc etc.  BUT a step in the right direction.  Throwing that cake away was DIFFICULT.     I'm working to set up an accountabililty network.  I'm working on it.

4 comments:

Jen said...

I have no control.

Sometimes I think the pain in my emotional health effects the pain in my physical health. My foot has also been bothering me :(

spunkysuzi said...

"hugs"

timothy said...

bravo on the cake dump! it's tasty but we both know it's pretty poison. if that foot is still bothering you a dr's visit may be needed. you have to make sure you dont make an injury worse. sending you reiki and prayers sweetie! xoxoxoxoxo

E. Jane said...

Good for you throwing out the cake. It's hard, but for me, it's necessary if I am to stay on track.